When it comes to making a toast, everybody wants to come across like Hugh Grant in Four Weddings and a Funeral. But Hugh had the advantage of highly-paid Hollywood screen writers and several retakes -- where you've only got one opportunity to do it, live and from the heart.

The best toast-makers are those who flatter the wedding couple, bring an element of humor to the occasion, and charm the audience of wedding guests. Here are some tips for making your wedding toast the second best moment of the day:

The toast is the tribute. The point of the toast should be in keeping with the point of the day -- to honor the bride and groom. If you stay true to this single goal, nothing you say will cause a pang of regret later in the evening, or later in the marriage.

Don’t expect the bride to toast with you. It would be inappropriate for her to join in a toast to herself. Instead she’ll stay seated throughout the toast, nodding or bowing in your direction at the end.

Humor is good The wedding toast is an excellent opportunity to add levity to the day. After everyone has endured the somberness of a typical wedding ceremony a little comic relief is like a breath of fresh air. Quite ironically, the kind of humor most flattering to the toast-maker is mildly self-deprecating.

Insulting humor is bad. Humor is the easiest way to bring charm to your toast, but don't use it at the expense of the wedding couple. Sometimes the hardest part is understanding what the bride or groom will consider insulting. If you've seen one of them bristle when you've brought a topic up in the past, or if you’re unsure, the wedding toast is not the time to re-introduce it. Bringing the wedding couple down in any way only brings you down in the eyes of the other guests.

Anecdotes. Tell the tale of the first time you saw the wedding couple together to serve as a reminder to everyone that this couple shares a history. That history will serve as the foundation for the marriage. Anecdotes also help to fill in the blanks for guests who may not know the couple as well as members of the bridal party.

Brevity. While you may feel like this is your shining moment -- keep in mind who's shining moment it's supposed to be. And remember, by the time you've launched your toast just about everyone has a glass of champagne in hand. The only thing standing between a guest and his or her champagne is your speech.

Above all, sincerity. Maybe you need to write your whole speech, then burn it. Speaking from your head and your heart is sure to bring the moment an appropriately sentimental touch. If ever there was a time to be squishy, touchy-feely -- this is it.